Self For Others

My Heart beats
So it may continue to beat
My Lungs fill
So they may continue to fill
My Muscles contract
So they may continue to contract
My Bones hold
So they may continue to hold
I live
So I may continue to live

My Heart should beat
So other Hearts may continue to beat
My Lungs should fill
So others can be filled
My Muscles should contract
So others may be made strong
My Bones should hold
So others can be held
I should live
So others can live

My Heart will beat
For Hearts that beat no more
My Lungs will fill
For Lungs that cannot fill
My Muscles will contract
For Muscles without the ability
My Bones will hold
For Bones not strong enough
I will live
For Lives not given the chance.

Why Not?

Hello There
How are you?

Do you have any ghosts?
Any memories that haunt?
Any people you wish weren't there?
I do.
I have ghosts that aren't dead.
Memories that...
On second thought
I won't give you it.
I won't give you what you want to hear.
You want to know my life is hell.
You want to know that you have broken the fourth wall.
I have a few words.
Because we are acting in theater of the absurd.
Why continue your charade?
Why waste yourself?
When you have what you want?
Or is she not enough?
Was she never what you really wanted?
My sadness is your true goal.
She is just a way to get to me.
A pawn in your game;
I refuse to play
I cut you off, deny you satisfaction.
But this isn't about you.
It's about me.
Always.
I am alive.
Like the hills.
I hope you got that.
I did.

Pick Me

Roll the die

Cast your character

Pick the stats

Reroll

Find one you like

I am the character

You roll what you see

some have one face in the back of their thoughts

I have many

Laughing, Watching

Pick a face

choose a name

I am who you want me to be

I show you what you want to see

The truth lies in what you know

Not who you know.

Teardrops

The rain beats heavy on us
As your tears flow
Blending with the river on your saddened face
I look into your eyes
My words cut through the air
Straight to your heart
You want to leave me alone
And never look back
You want to give up
Every word a raindrop
Every syllable a molecule
Sharper then crystal
I want this
But not this way
Patience is a virtue
But the way is paved with sorrow
The rain leaving constant reminders of how things used to be
I can’t leave like this
Not this way

The Broken Mirror

The rain falls in sheets
Soaks me to the core
Our words like static
Broken by the drops on your car
The rain distracts
From the pain
I can’t react
Like I used to
I wish
For just one moment
Things could be better
But I can’t begin to pick up the pieces
Left by this brokenness
I try and look for my reflection in the broken mirror of our hearts
But only seem to break it more
Make it worse
The shattered pieces
Distort the true message

I am peace but violence

I am the wolf
I howl at the moon
I draw you in with a look
I am the black bear
Warm and comforting
More dangerous than I appear
I am the hawk
Soaring beautifully with talons out
Ready to strike
I am the pheonix
Burning and Brilliant
Embracing you in fiery destruction
I am the mind
That understands life
And knows how to break it
I am the body
Built on difference
Able to woo you to pieces
I am the spirit
Seeking to shine
But only drowning
I am the "good"
That draws you close
And breaks you to bits

Only You (Song)

Like a baby
trying to stand
trying to walk
I stumble and I fall
No object in this world
Can keep me up
Can stop me from hitting the ground

Only You can hold me
Only You can catch me
Only You can be my cushion
Only You can lift me up

As I run
I stumble
Look to those around
To catch me
To Lift me up
But they can't keep me up

Only You can hold me
Only You can catch me
Only You can be my cushion
Only You can lift me up

As I grow old
My body weakens
My bones creak
No rail or bar
can keep me from falling
can stop the break
can prevent the pain

Only You can hold me
Only You can catch me
Only You can be my cushion
Only You can lift me up

I reach for you when falling
Scream for you in pain
Cry for you in sorrow
Call to you from the ground
Because

Only You can hold me
Only You can catch me
Only You can be my cushion
Only You can lift me up

When All The Cards Are Down

When all the pieces fall
When all the cards are down
When the darkness once again fills my heart
Who can I turn to?
Where can I run?
When I take no satisfaction
from earthly relationships
When I smile faintly when
the round peg goes in the square hole
The hole that is my heart
I find nothing satisfies
Nothing makes me truly happy
Nothing makes me smile more
Then the peg that fits best
I need you
My rock
I cling to you in the storm
I will seek you more from here on
and strive until I see your face
Please help me put the pieces back
Where you designed them be
For only you can know
how the puzzle fits best.

My Soul Burns

My soul burns
With the fury
Of a thousand suns
Because of the betrayal
By the one I Loved
All was lost
Long Before
I
Fade out
He
Fades in
I
am alone
With my flaws
I reach out in all directions
Reaching for a base
I find nothing solid but the spot I stand
I look upward and forwards
The answers reveal themselves
One at a time
Slowly
As my soul burns

Let's see how I write

Lets see how I write
If my thoughts aren't straight thought
When my mind is off
in many directions

Let's see how I write
When I'm tired and bored
When I'm all alone
save for a small human connection

Let's see how I write
if when I close my eyes I wonder
will I open them again?
Or will I fall asleep

I think I write splendid
Low on sleep
High on boredom
What do you think?

When I look in the mirror

When I look into the mirror
I see a collection
A walking album
Of a life
Still growing

When I look into the mirror
I see a person
Shaped by time and influence
From
God
Parents
Friends

When I look into the mirror
I see a man who escaped
To broaden his horizons
To live life his way

When I look into the mirror
I see myself
And everything I have done
And everything I am
And everything I have yet to do

How can I go on?

How can I go on?
Not sharing a word
Not sharing a thought
How can I go on?
Without your smile
Without your touch
How can I go on?
Missing your mind
Missing your company
How can I go on?
When you are my going on.

Teammate

I walk
Slowly at first
Straining my eyes to see
I apply pressure to the pavement
I stretch my leg further
Reaching for a spot
I put thought to my steps
My foot snags a rock
Tumble across the pavement
I sit up
A hand reaches out to me
My teammate
Lifts me up
So I can finish the race

Shattered

Look in the mirror
stare into your own eyes
Your mind slowly cracking
Your soul losing grip
The Harder you try
The worse it gets
Until
There is silence

Dreaming

Sometimes
I fear sleeping
Not that I won't awaken
But that what I see
while in that place
My dreams
They make me dread the place I go
When my head lays down

What is Love?

What is love?
Love is many things
Love is in your heart
Love is in your being
Love is for your friends
To help when needed
Love is for family
To be the glue that binds the world
Love is in the eyes of your forever
The one you were given to always be
Love is many things
What is love?
You tell me.

The Frozen Ocean

I stand on the sand

Staring down the waves

Of this frozen ocean

I watch as those around act

"Let's do this" I command myself

The salty air beats against my body

I take strides toward fate

My body numbs

I'm in

The cold embraces me

I rise up

Fighting for control

Am I moving?

The cold tries to pull me back

I escape

To swim another day

Poetry of the Soul

This next year should and will be a better year, a better beginning to a better decade.

The years pass
Time ticks away
Is it our duty
to watch it?
It slips through our fingers

I tried to keep track
I saw each event
as it became dust
nothing but a scar in my brain

I could not catch all the grains
My hands can only hold so much

I write now
My soul fresh and open
My poetry on display
not for anyone but
discipline
and God

This is my story
This is my life
Through the eyes of a poet